hyacinth girl (dramatae) wrote,
hyacinth girl
dramatae

I feel the need to record this Facebook exchange for posterity. (of how I and my friends are assholes, if nothing else.)  (Disclaimer: I don't think everyone in the UK is racist.  I do, however, find it (and chauvism & to an extent homophobia) to be a lot more socially acceptable here, still, than it is in my hometown.)  The gold is near the end, but full conversation included for context and reason why it's all in caps:

Caley > Jacqui
I think I may regret asking this, but how is "The Beatles" a place to live in Canada? I DON'T THINK IT MEANS WHAT I THINK IT MEANS.
Jacqui: I SAID VANCOUVER/VICTORIA. I know "The Beatles" would not be a surprising answer for me to give, but in this case I am innocent!
Caley: KEEPING WITH THE CAPS LOCK THEME, REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I WAS GOING TO GET THIS? [redacted]

YEAH. I GOT IT. WAAAAT.
Jacqui: CAPS ARE RAD. AS IS YOUR TATTOO. VERY PRETTY. I AM GETTING ANOTHER ONE SOON, TOO, I HOPE.
Caley: IT'S CAPS LOCK FRIDAY UP IN THIS SHIT, WHAT'S HAPPENING ACROSS THE POND? IT IS SUNNY HERE AND I HAVE BANGS. THAT'S ABOUT ALL THAT'S GOING ON IN CANADA AT THE MOMENT.
Jacqui: I LIKE YOUR BANGS. MY HAIR IS BRIGHT RED AGAIN. IT IS ALSO SUNNY HERE, I AM GETTING A TAN. ASIDE FROM THAT NOT MUCH.
Caley: WHEN YOU SAY TAN, DO YOU MEAN A LOVELY SHADE OF "PORCELAIN BEIGE INSTEAD OF ~IVORY~? I WANT TO SEE THIS FLAMING RED HAIR, YOU MUST POST A PHOTO.
Jacqui: I MEAN I TURN PINK AND THEN IT FADES TO SOMETHING NOT QUITE SO PASTY AS I NORMALLY AM. & I WILL TRY. FOR SOME REASON MY WEB CAM DOESN'T PICK UP THE RED. WEIRD.
Caley: I FIND YOUR WEBCAM IS BEING SEVERELY COLOURIST IN ITS DECISIONS.
Jacqui: RACIST AGAINST GINGERS.
Jacqui: LIKE THAT MIA VIDEO
Caley: EVERYONE HATES ON THE GINGERS. DESPITE THERE BEING SOME VERY BEAUTIFUL ONES IN THE WORLD.

HATERADE.
Jacqui: THERE IS A LEGITIMATE PREJUDICE AGAINT GINGERS IN THE UK, I AM NOT EVEN JOKING. THIS COUNTRY IS FUCKED.
Jacqui: THEY'RE ALSO JUST PRETTY RACIST, THOUGH.
Caley: IT'S LIKE YOU'RE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS COUNTRY. IF THIS WERE DR. PHIL JACQUI, I'D TELL YOU TO LEAVE NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU LOVE IT.

AND THEN YOU WOULD HAVE AN EPIC BREAKDOWN THAT INVOLVES MASCARA RACCOON EYES AND TEAR STREAKED MAKEUP.
Caley: YOU HAVE TO HAVE THE STRENGTH TO ~*MOVE ON*~
Jacqui: FUCK DR PHIL. AND HIS STUPID FUCKING ACCENT.
Jacqui: YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND OUR LOOOOOOVE
Caley: OH I HEAR SOME VITRIOL IN THAT TONE OF VOICE. PREACH TO THE CHOIR, SISTER.

ON AN UNRELATED NOTE, I AM GOING TO A RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE COVER BAND ON SUNDAY WITH HEATHER. I FIGURE THAT I'LL NEVER SEE THEM LIVE WITH ZACH DE LA ROCHA EVER, SO I'M GOING TO SETTLE FOR THE NEXT BEST THING.
Jacqui: I APPROVE OF THIS PLAN. I AM DOING SOMETHING SIMILAR BUT FAR MORE GEEKY BY GOING TO SEE A SCREENING OF FRANKENSTEIN BY THE NATIONAL THEATRE BECAUSE THERE ARE NO LIVE TICKETS LEFT. BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH & JONNY LEE MILLER DIRECTED BY DANNY BOYLE, YES PLS.
Caley: OH MY. YOU WIN.

TOO BAD YOU MISSED AN EPIC TIME WHEN IAIN, MY FRIEND SOO AND I WENT TO A LED ZEPPELIN COVER BAND AT SUGAR. IT WAS REALLY GOOD, AND IAIN GOT PUNCHED IN THE FACE BY SOO BECAUSE HE MADE HER CROWD SURF.

GOOD, SAFE, PG-13 FRIENDLY TIMES.
Jacqui: IN GEEKERY, MAYBE.

ACTUALLY, IAIN TOLD ME ABOUT THAT NIGHT. AND THE GIRL HE WAS MACKING ON WHO THEN WENT OFF TO FLIRT WITH SOMEONE ELSE. I WILL ADMIT TO SOMETIMES MISSING VICTORIA.
Caley: TO QUOTE IAIN'S BRILLIANCE (HE WILL LIKELY PUNCH ME LATER, BUT IT WILL BE WORTH IT): "YOU KNOW, I CAME OUT TONIGHT NOT EXPECTING TO GO HOME WITH ANYONE. SO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO? I'M GOING TO GET MORE DRUNK, AND GO HOME AND MASTURBATE. AND YOU KNOW WHAT? THAT'S OKAY."
Jacqui: THAT IS BRILLIANCE. HE DID NOT TELL ME ABOUT THAT, JUST HIS RIDICULOUS PICK UP LINE THAT ACTUALLY WORKED.
Jacqui: AT FIRST.
Caley: SHE ENDED UP SAYING SHE WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND THEN LEFT WITH SOME OTHER DUDE.

PURE CLASS GIRLFRIEND, PURE CLASS.
Jacqui: YEEEAH, WELL. WHATCHA GON' DO?
Caley
: DRINK MORE!
Jacqui: AND THEN GO HOME AND MASTURBATE.
Subscribe

  • autobiography through popular culture

    my face is unappealing, and my thoughts are unoriginal. i did experiment with substances, but all they did was make me ill. i used to do the i…

  • (no subject)

    ca·thar·sis (k-thärss) n. pl. ca·thar·ses (-sz) 1. A purifying or figurative cleansing of the emotions, especially…

  • (no subject)

    Happy Earth Day, everybody! Some suggestions: Get outside into this beautiful sunshine. Make a pledge to start recycling more. Plant a tree. Use…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 0 comments